What I’m Thankful For This Year

Column By TOM GARRISON

Each November I compose and send to relatives and friends a “Thanksgiving Thankful List” for the preceding year.

My wife Deb and I enjoy our life in red rock southern Utah and have many things for which we are thankful. We hope sharing them brings a smile and an acknowledgment that even in tough economic times there are things for which to be grateful. Below is the 2013 list.

  • We are thankful for the invention of the non-kinking garden hose. (After considerable Internet research, I could not pin down the inventor. Even that font of online knowledge, Wikipedia, did not have an entry.) Few things are as irritating as watering your garden with a regular hose and the water suddenly stops because of a kink about 15 feet away. No problem, just give the hose it a good jerk. That helped, the simple kink has become a Gordian knot of tangled hose. Okay, lay down the hose, walk to the kink, flip the hose around, and back to the garden. Non-kinkers eliminate this scenario.
  • We are thankful for the inventor of photography—Frenchman Joseph N. Niepce in 1826—and the many improvements since, enabling us to capture the beauty of southern Utah and surrounding areas during our monthly hikes/explorations. It is much easier sharing a photo rather than describing, or God forbid, drawing, “The Wave” or Zion National Park.
  • Deb and I are thankful to have reached the status of senior/seasoned citizens (60+ years old). It seems as if everywhere we spend money, senior discounts are available. Since you can’t take it with you, I guess these establishments believe we ought to leave at least part of it with them. That’s a fair deal. How did we ever survive financially paying full fare?
  • We appreciate Gelos, the god of laughter in Greek mythology. Obviously laughing is fun and contagious. In addition, considerable research (so that is where your tax dollars go—funding research on laughing) shows that our bodies produce endorphins when we laugh, making us feel more upbeat. Laughter also helps block pain, relax muscles, fight infections, and reduce emotional stress. Given all that let me tell you story: “Two LDS missionaries mistakenly enter a bar ….”
  • We are thankful for our amazing bodies. No, our bodies are pretty much the same as everyone’s. But consider the simple act of walking. Your entire 11 stone (154 pounds; one stone equals 14 pounds in the British system of weights) body weight rests on two relatively small feet held up by stick-like legs. This whole Rube Goldberg contraption somehow manages to be erect and balanced (assuming your alcohol intake is moderate). You can even run and jump. Wow!
  • I’m thankful for and love the flexibility of the English language. I can make-up words like “dudeette” for a female dude and people know what I’m talking about. (They may, however, frown due to my lack of political correctness.)
  • We are ecstatic that we do not live in the Pleistocene Era. If we did, our seven pound domestic cat Molly, an excellent hunter, would be a several hundred pound saber-tooth cat. Instead of bringing us a dead mouse or lizard present several times a week, she would be dragging in some colossal herbivore. Imagine having to clean that mess.

Stop for a moment and remember the many good things from the past year for which to be thankful.

Freelance writer Tom Garrison is retired and enjoying life in beautiful St. George, Utah with his wife Deb and two cats. His latest book, “”Why We Left the Left: Personal Stories of Leftists/Liberals Who Evolved to Embrace Libertarianism.” is now available as an ebook and in paperback. Contact Tom at tomgarrison98@yahoo.com.

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