By Fr. Glenn Jones:
Oh, I can hear some now: “What a doof! It’s “unDUE” influence!!” Well … just keep readin’.
Who can deny that there is loads of unDUE influence in our world today—probably always has been. Some celebrity says something, and devotees swallow it hook, line and sinker … and much of the media capitalize on opportunity. Popularity sells, after all. The latest fad—whether it be apparel, trend or politics—tends to take a life of its own and explode throughout society—especially in these days of instant communication and social media.
Yet, as is often bemoaned by the grounded, WHY should individuals with little or no experience or training in a particular field have so much influence in that field? After all, we wouldn’t go to the latest clothing designer to have taxes done, or to an actor to consult on nuclear physics (and certainly NOT a physicist on interior decorating! (kidding! Tweaking labbies a bit J). And yet how often we race to the newest thing or idea simply becomes someone popular says it or does it? … sort of vicarious popularity: “Basketballer Bob and me … we’re SO much alike. We’re buds!”
Unknowledgeable notables may have good intentions, but are simply influenced by “feelings” elicited by limited data. The danger of this, of course, is at least twofold. First, “feelings” are no guarantor of truth or of the Good; anyone who has had a child fall in love with a destructive person (or remember ourselves doing it) knows that very well. Often one who loves is used, abused, discarded. After all, if feelings in themselves were a measure of the true, then there would be no divorce; who (sincerely) marries a person with the idea of divorcing later? Yet one “feels” in love and that “it will last forever” (cue little birdies singing rapturously).
Secondly, feelings combined with our natural animal passions can tend to drag us downward in our attempts to climb to greater moral heights … impeding—or even reversing—the attainment of that which is beneficial to both ourselves and to others. A common pitfall is the attractive co-worker who shows interest: the married person knows and has vowed to stay faithful to his/her spouse, and yet … temptation. Yet even a single fall has potential to wreak havoc in so many lives—spouses, children, co-workers, etc., not to mention obliterating honor and facilitating the ease of succumbing in the future—not only in that arena, but in others. “Hey…”, he thinks… “I cheated on the wife; I may as well cheat my boss … my co-worker … my friend … my mom. God.” And when havoc is wrought in a few, it is felt by many: the children’s schoolmates, both spouses’ families … everyone associated with them, and beyond. Like the ripple a pebble makes travels to the limits of the pond, such actions reverberate throughout society. All because of a momentary dalliance … suppressing rationality and honor and the Good to give in to a fleeting “feeling”.
Jesus teaches us: “Do to others whatever you would have them do to you. This is the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 7:12). But, in rationality rather than emotion, what would I really want done to me? Would it not be that which is to my true benefit? This is a dilemma that kindly persons encounter: the self-destructive person pleading for something that will in reality continue to enable—or even further—his destruction. And yet, love or sympathy for the person impels the kindly person to give that very thing which, in the end, will enable and prove most destructive.
The point: be wary of—and undo—undue influences.
Parents struggle with this endlessly, trying to steer their kids toward the beneficial and away from the destructive. Of course … easier said than done. That money given to the drug-addicted son is not for drugs, but in all hope that maybe—just maybe—he finally realizes the dead end (perhaps literally) that he’s on and will really—THIS time—use it to clean up. A parent’s hope springs eternal … no matter how often it is dashed. Or, at least, that he won’t get shot robbing someone to get his next fix.
The solution for undue influences? For oneself, nothing easy: strength, courage, determination to seek the good over mere desire. Eternal vigilance, realizing one’s innate weaknesses and avoiding dangers. Indefatigability (love that word) … realizing that the struggle is unending … swimming upstream. In this we remember St. Paul: “…let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:12-13). And perhaps even more so: “I can do all things in him who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
As for undoing undue influences in others … well, that’s not possible unless they come to a realization of their own. But the best way to affect our own spheres is, of course, by example. Christians have long learned that the best evangelization is accomplished not by word, but by example and attitude. “You are the light of the world…Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 5:14-16) As St. Francis of Assisi reportedly said: “Love, and do what you will”—that “love” forswearing sexual exploitation, for true love is far beyond sexuality. After all, God designed sex to be a product of, and to facilitate in the true commitment between spouses, love … so sex certainly is not in itself love. God is not physically “sexual” and yet God IS love (1 John 4:16) and from whom all true love flows; therefore, true love is not sex, else prostitution would be the most loving career of all! … which is, of course, ludicrous.
Real love is rather seeking the true benefit of the other which is beyond mere feelings, even at sacrifice of oneself. And this is why we Catholics hold the crucifix—the greatest of self-sacrifice—to be the very image, and embodiment, of Love.
Rev. Glenn Jones is the Vicar General of the Archdiocese of Santa Fe and former pastor of Immaculate Heart of Mary Catholic Church in Los Alamos.
