Clergy from left, Deacon Amy Schmuck, Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, retired, The Rev. Mary Ann Hill and The Rev. Lynn Finnegan. Photo by Nate Limback/ladailypost.com
By Deacon Cynthia Z. Biddlecomb, M.Div.
ELCA retired
A long road trip earlier this month resulted in several rock chips in the windshield. And wouldn’t you know it, the morning after we got back, I watched as a deep one of those chips slowly created a vertical crack.
On the way home from getting the glass replaced, I drove into heavy rain and fearfully used the wipers. Keep the back window open a bit to reduce air pressure, the service tech had said, but the storm forced me to close it.
For the rest of the 48-hours, I had to reopen and close it again as rain came and went. Cracks are a part of life. I have had a few, and not just on windshields. Life holds ups and downs, sometimes incredible times of joy and sometimes months and years of grief. We go through so much in this life. Suffering is not unknown to us. But neither is joy.
Why would a loving God allow suffering? What is the purpose of the chips flying into our lives, or the cracks in our otherwise peaceful existence? Like the rock chips, the slings and arrows in life aren’t always aimed at us intentionally. Yet, damage is done.
The windshield metaphor only goes so far. Cracks appear in everything. Nothing is “perfectly perfect”. Living through each crack, we eventually manage to fill it and go on with our lives. But, if we look for them, those cracks will still be there as valued experiences.
Perhaps you have seen Japanese pottery that has had its cracks filled with gold? The art form is called “Kintsugi”, where the breakage is mended by filling it with a type of lacquer often mixed with powdered gold. “As a philosophy, [kintsugi] treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise.” (Wikipedia)
Now in my senior years, I look back on breakages and repairs that form parts of my personal history. These cracks, though humbling at the time, were eventually filled with precious healing. We don’t get through life unscathed. But with faith, we can be led to healing. We needn’t disguise our painful life experiences; occasionally, sharing them can be helpful as we listen to folks facing their own trials. Perhaps we can be that back window, opening ourselves to relieve the pressure building up in another person’s life.
In his Selected Poems, 1956-1968, the Canadian poet Leonard Cohen wrote the much-quoted lyric: “There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” That’s how we get through life, recognizing that our imperfections and historic cracks are what have made us notice the Light getting through. Rather than gilding the cracks, let’s be humbled by them.
Our imperfections bring us to our knees before Christ Jesus. Through faith in God, we can see how Light got through the cracks and into our lives. Thank you, Lord, for those difficult experiences that brought us to our life of faith in you. Amen.
Editor’s note: ‘All Shall Be Well’ is a column written by local women clergy including The Rev. Mary Ann Hill, Rector, Trinity on the Hill Episcopal Church (momaryannhill@gmail.com); The Rev. Lynn Finnegan, Associate Rector, The Episcopal Church of the Holy Faith, Santa Fe (rev.lynn@holyfaithchurchsf.org); Deacon Amy Schmuck, Bethlehem Evangelical Lutheran Church (deaconamy@bethluth.com); and ELCA Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, M.Div., retired (czoebidd@gmail.com).