Clergy from left, Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, retired; Pastor Nicolé Ferry, Associate Rector Lynn Finnegan and Pastor Deb Church. Courtesy photo
By The Rev. Nicolé Raddu Ferry
Bethlehem Lutheran Church
Los Alamos
A Blessing for “When Church Breaks Your Heart” by Dr. Kate Bowler
“Blessed are you standing among the ruins of a family of faith that once felt so sturdy, now turned to dust under your feet.
The certainty you once had, gone. The community you loved, dissipated.
The hope you held dear, hard to find.
Instead, what’s taken up residence is the very stuff that seems counter to what you imagined:
Disappointment. Doubt. Disillusionment. Despair.
In this new landscape, may you practice the courage to find the others who make space for your questions without easy answers, who celebrate doubt when it makes room for more faith, who search high and low for a defiant hope born amidst despair.
Bless you, dear one.
You who don’t give up wrestling. Who have eyes to see something new being rebuilt on top of what was.
Blessed are you who walk away wounded, yes. But changed.
You are not the bad thing. You are a gift. And we love every bit of you.”
It may seem strange for the pastor of an institutional church to begin an article with such a blessing, and yet this is the blessing we need in the world we live in.
Folks have been hurt by the institutional church. Folks have been told that doubts and questions and clarifications mean you do not have faith. Leadership in churches have not shown the love of God, nor the walk of Jesus that we claim to hold. Conversations within our churches have not been as life-giving as the word of God can, and should, be.
I just heard from someone who has been a person of faith her entire life and who is now working for a church in Colorado say: “I do not understand why people in churches complain so much when we have so much love and grace to give?”
Yup, we do. Yup, we sometimes do not get it right.
In the past few months I have been given deep clarity about the relevance being a part of a faith community can bring.
With joy I have presided over three weddings with couples who are beginning new lives together, wanting a public witness to the love they share, knowing their marriage will not be perfect and that each day they will need to decide to be married.
With a broken heart, I have led two celebrations of life for 19-year-olds whose lives were cut short, and we gathered to name our love for them, to name our questions of why, and to cry together with grief that will last.
With hope I have witnessed folks coming together to share resources to meet the needs of those longing for food, for housing, for companionship when isolated, for a visit when in prison.
So dear ones, keep asking us your questions, deeply pushing us to live into the love that Jesus showed us, the service that Jesus modeled for us. Know you are a beloved child of God and that nothing can separate you from the love of God.
Romans 8:37-39: “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Editor’s note: ‘All Shall Be Well’ is a semi-monthly column written by local women clergy (pastors and deacons) including, ELCA Deacon Cynthia Biddlecomb, M.Div., retired (czoebidd@gmail.com); Nicolé Ferry, Pastor, Bethlehem Evangelical Lutheran Church (pastornicole@bethluth.com); Lynn Finnegan, Associate Rector, The Episcopal Church of the Holy Faith, Santa Fe (rev.lynn@holyfaithchurchsf.org) and Deb Church, Pastor, White Rock Presbyterian Church (pastor@wrpchurch.com).
